What's my name again?

STEVE HOLT!!

If I'm going to get to know you, maybe I should let you in on why people are calling me names other than Steve, my Saber Tooth Tiger and friends.

Nicknames. Nicknames, nicknames, nicknames.  They are an intriguing part of life, aren't they?  First you destest them, then you accept them, then, finally, you embrace them.  Anybody can call you a nickname, but only your real friends know why and how you got your nickname, and make sure they stick. Since you are all my friends, I will give you the low down on some of the more interesting and impactful nicknames I've had in my life.

First, we're going to go all the way back to middle school, when I had the nickname Stephenengland.  Yes, that's right, my full name was my nickname.  One day riding the bus (dude, the bus sucks) somebody decided that my first and last name flowed together so smoothly that he began calling me Stephenengland.  It stuck instantly.  Everybody started calling me by my full name at all times.  I was Stephen Gregory England and had the nickname Stephenengland.  That is, until high school and the absolutely memorable times on the high school football team.

Now, I was not the fastest person on my football team, or the biggest, or the strongest, or the...oh what the hell? Let's face it, I wasn't athletically gifted in any way imaginable.  However, to my teammates on the great H-Town Eagles, I will always be known as Gunz.  Oh Yes, welcome to the Gunz show.  I don't really remember the exact origin of this nickname, I think it was sometime during a weight room session I was lifting, and a coach walked by and said "C'mon Guns", or something like that.  But this name really stuck. First with my teammates, then all around school, even some of the teachers may have referred to me as Gunz one time or another.  Definitely the most funny, and ridiculously ironic nickname I've ever had.

In college, I got another nickname related to my real name.  I was introduced to somebody, now a friend of mine, who heard my name Steve England and said "What, like Steve Holt?"  To which I obviously responded to by raising my hands in the air and yelling "Steve Holt!" imitating everybody's favorite dumb jock from TV's Arrested Development.  To that group of friends, I am now forever known as Steve Holt!.  That name has been written on walls on bars all over East Lansing, and now when I return, there are multiple occasions when I show off my Steve Holt! impression.

Finally, we get to present times.  College and high school are over, but I still managed to be more familiarly known as a name that is not my own.  Today, I am known as Scott, Scotty, Scott Schwarzinger, or Schwarz.  It started months ago, when I was mistakenly called Scott during a presentation I gave at work.  Three friends were in attendance, and just looked at me and smiled when I was called Scott.  I instantly knew that my days being known as Steve were officially numbered.  I obtained a last nickname while golfing, involving a mispronounciation of the Slazenger brand golf ball.  But anyway, Scott has gotten way out of hand.  I now have to introduce myself as "Steve, but you may here people call me Scott" or "Nice to meet you too, my name is actually Steve though."  I am pretty sure there are some of my friends who have never called me by my real name.  It also started a trend where all newbies to the group were given new names, like Kyle or, of course, Cathy, my Saber Tooth Tiger.  (C'mon, you didn't think I would disclose the real name of my Saber Tooth Tiger, did you?)

Well, sorry for the long post, but I had way too much fun writing it. 

Goodnight Cathy.